dragged... (Part 32)

                     Confessions  

“It seems just like yesterday when I saw my whole world crumble…I was dressed in a black tux and tails, the day was absolutely crisp and clear, and an array of family and friends were crammed in the pews, sitting together to witness what was supposed to have been my wedding day…but then…in the midst of all those smiling faces…this monster’s lust filled grin knocked me off of my path and I wound up…” The brotha named Stanley said, pausing before completing his confession. 

Everyone sitting in their chairs could not take their eyes off of this guy, who was literally pouring his heart out.  He had one of the most painful expressions on his face that I had ever seen and he spoke with such intensity until I started looking around for an exit, because I didn’t know what he was capable of in his state of mind.  I knew that I still probably had some cocaine in my system and that it was magnifying my paranoia. 

I’m not lying; I remember this one time after hitting the white girl real good when someone rattled a potato chip bag in the room – I almost jumped up off the couch and shot through the roof like the fucking space shuttle.  It was crazy I’m telling you; and all the other coke heads in the room stopped getting high and looked at me like I was a lunatic. I was tweaking with such fervor that I actually thought I saw ducks waddling up and down my arms.  I kept swatting at them like a damn idiot.    

Even though I was the only person in the room who could remember that memory, I felt so motherfucking embarrassed until I started blushing to myself.  A light sweat started spreading across my forehead, and I couldn’t seem to keep myself still sitting in my chair.  Nick nudged me and whispered, “Nigga, chill the fuck out, you acting just like one of those crack heads that are always panhandling around the gas station.”

I scoffed so loudly until it drew attention.  I put my hand over my mouth, coughed as if I were just trying to clear my throat, and sunk back down in my seat.  The glares I was getting forced me to look down to at the floor.  Instead of seeing it as a moment of humility, I looked at it as just one more reason not to return once the meeting adjourned.  With Nick and my uncle sitting on both sides of me, I decided it was best to ride it out, but I knew in my heart that I wasn’t coming back.  I could stop all on my own.  Yea, that’s what most druggies always thought. 

Eventually, old boy continued telling his dreadful wedding story and when he got to the punch line I thought I was going to bust a seam in my soiled, musty, shirt.  I couldn’t believe that he just stood there and told everyone he got caught butt assed naked, rolling around with his sister’s brother in the preacher’s office at the church.  Now that was one of the wildest stories I had ever heard before in my life.   He was lucky he didn’t get a cap popped in his faggot ass. 

Out the corner of my eye, I saw my boy Nick looking at me, but I pretended not to see him looking.  I had never felt so much compassion for anyone, but I couldn’t help it, that nigga had experienced something that I hoped I would never ever experience, but then, that is what you get when you tip toed around on the down low – eventually you always got caught.  

“I wanted to kill him … he told me that I was so damn stupid for fucking over his sister…almost as if he were separating himself from what we did.  I tried telling my girl that it was just a onetime thing and that it was a mistake, but she called me a faggot ass motherfucker and told me that I needed to be strung up by my balls and castrated.  It was one of the most humiliating moments in my life and I swore that if I ever had the chance to get my hands on the he-male bitch that took away my life, I was going to make him pay.” He said, still looking upward towards the ceiling off into space. 

“Stanley, that will be enough brotha, it’s time to give someone else an opportunity to share…please take your seat…” The facilitator of the meeting said. 

The room was so quiet that you could probably hear a flea pissing on cotton.  After a testimony like that, I knew I wasn’t going to try to follow it – hell, I wasn’t about to get up in front of all these total strangers and tell anyone the shit I had gone through.  As I sat there pondering about my next move, I could still hear the brotha mumbling incoherently beneath his breath. 

“Fucking…Sunny…fucking faggot…fucking female with a dick…yea…I decked her ass at that club…I tried to knock the evil out of her …I wanted to drop her with the first punch…yea…I did it too..” he kept repeating over and over. 

When I managed to make out what it was he was saying I couldn’t believe it…talk about six degrees of separation… only one bitch could screw somebody’s mind up this bad…when he said Sunny, I knew who he was talking about…

The cunning…

The infamous…

The cut throat…

The vile…

The conniving…

The he-male bitch of all he-male bitches…

Sunny Motherfucking Skies…..

It seemed this brotha and I had more in common than I realized.  Before this meeting dispersed, I was going to pick his brains and find out just how much more he knew about old Sunny.  I knew that the bitch was low, but fucking your sister’s groom on her wedding day….

Now fuck that was low…

Yea, I knew I had to stop this bitch and this dude was now my new partner in crime.  I looked at him over in his chair, mumbling, and I thought to myself; damn how could a nice looking brotha like that allow himself to get wrapped up in the coils of such a snake.  If it hadn’t happened to me too, I wouldn’t be able to understand, but I did because she had wrapped her bone crushing coils around me too…. 

Now I knew why she was all bandaged up…

          If I didn’t know what had to be done back then, I certainly did know now.  She had to be stopped before she hurt anyone else.  I had never committed murder before but I had come close to doing it not so long ago.  It was when this real female, Honey White, had my heart all wrapped up in her juices.  I gave her as much of me as I could, and I ain’t gonna lie, she had me whipped; had a nigga handing over his check and shit. 

          I was sprung on this broad.  The evening that killed everything was when I had gotten off work early.  I had stopped by a jewelry store and picked her up a nice little ½ karat diamond neckless, and when I walked through the doors of our apartment with it in one hand and a dozen red roses in the other, I was knocked to my knees by the aroma of sex that filled the air.

          At first I thought I was imagining things and that it was from the previous night when we had kicked it, until I heard loud moans coming from our bedroom.  I threw everything to the floor and ran into the room to find that bitch and the Mexican Maintence man in there butt assed naked.  He was hitting her so hard that he never even heard me open the door.   I used that moment, to retrieve a butcher knife from the wooden holder in the kitchen.  

          When I returned, they were still heavily into it.  I swung and carved a straight Z into his immigrant ass back, and when he rolled over, Honey saw the blood dripping from the raised knife I still had in my right hand.  Before the bitch got one good scream out, I had taken a good swipe across both of her tits.  The chaos in the room was like something out of a good slasher movie.  I was swinging left and right with the speed of an ice sculptor, but instead of ice shavings actual flesh was flying in all directions.  The cuts weren’t life threatening but I made sure that she wasn’t going to look worth a damn to anybody for months.   By the time I got through with the bitch she looked like the bride of Frankenstein. 

          I see that Sunny needed a facial too…

          Oh, yea, she had awakened the monster….